First ever crack wrap!

Well I am just gonna do a quick recap of my Saturday because I have a movie night with my mom and sister and well to tell you the truth my day was kind of on the boring side.Morning snack was the new TJ trail mix I bought the other day and a Strawberry Boost. This was my first time having the mix and the bag already has a big dent in it, glad I know my family likes it!

The mix was filled with peanuts, almonds, macadamia nuts with dried pineapples and cranberries! It was the perfect combination and I am glad I bought it.
The star ingredient for todays lunch was this beauty: a freshly opened Smooth and Creamy Classic Hummus!Today I made my first ever crack wrap with a lil twist! On whole wheat bread I had the staples, creamy hummus and american cheese, but I also put some sliced apples in there as well. I paninied the sandwich to get the cheese nice and gooey for a few minutes and let me tell you this sandwich did not disappoint! I now know why everyone raves over this sandwich. The combination of the hummus and cheese melted together was out of this world and then the addition of the sweet apples was perfect.Mmmm! You can't tell me that doesn't look delicious? I had my crack wrap with some pretzels and the rest of my Gala apple with a glass of milk on the side.

Well it is almost nine o'clock and the movie is about to start! Have a great Saturday night :)

Reunited and it feels so good

Yay for the weekend finally being here! But I first must back track to yesterday and let you know how my day went.

Yesterday afternoon I had another weigh-in. I was very nrevous before hand which I really shouldn't have been because I was following my meal plan and doing everything I needed to do. So really there was nothing to be nervous about but yet I still was! But I must tell you my weigh-in went very well and my weight did go up! My nurse Candace who weighs me was joking with me and asked me if I was hiding any quarters and NO I wasn't! I also got my results back from my blood work and EKG and everything seemed to be normal except my heart rate was still low which my doctor said was a sign of malnutrition but as I keep gaining she expects it to increase.

So for all of you anonymous commenters who don't have the guts to post your real names and keep saying I will NEVER gain weight on the food I eat and think you know more than both my nutritionist and doctor. I would ike to tell you all you DON'T know what you are talking about and that is IS possible for me to gain weight on the foods I eat and that I can recovery on my own! Whew, I just had to get that off my chest.

After my appointment my mom and I went to Target (again!) to kill some time before we were off to an evening filled with basketball games. We had my lil sister's middle school game and then we headed out of town to my middle sister's high school game. Of course they both won, obvi!

Then I came home for a very late dinner. I needed something quick and yummy since it was already nine o'clock so I made myself an egg sandwich. The best way to cook eggs is in the microwave, hands down! I cooked up 2 whole eggs with a slice of american cheese on top in a bowl then put it in a english muffin and had a glass of milk on the side. Breakfast for dinner again, two days in one week? I will take it!

We scored some awesome goods while at Target. My dad has oatmeal nearly every morning so my mom bought the Value Pack of Quaker Instant Oatmeal with 4 flavors: Maple & Brown Sugar, Apples & Cinnamon, Cinnamon Roll, and Original. I told my mom I had oatmeal the other morning using the Quick Quaker Oats in the cabinet and how gross they were. She laughed at me and said she bought those to make oatmeal cookies and not for oatmeal for breakfast. She told me no wonder why they tasted gross and for next time to use the original flavor in this box. Mom always know best!

We also picked up some Chocolate Cheerios! This was the first time we ever saw them in the store so we of course had to buy them. My sister addicted cereal will be happy we got these ;)

I was so happy to be reunited with my yogurt mess again this morning after having a not so yummy oatmeal breaky the other day!
In my Anthrolopogie bowl was some Plain Brown Cow yogurt, Kashi Go Lean, a sliced banana, and a dollop of Crazy Richard's creamy peanut butter.

Why am I so obsessed with yogurt messes?!It was alright but I didn't love it ;)I found these pics on my camera from the other day from when I tried the Blueberry Crisp Clif Bar.This flavor was good and overall I liked it. The bar was dense and chewy which like a blueberry cookie with oats, pieces of blueberry, and almonds in it.Still does not live up to my favorite Clif Bar flavor yet, Oatmeal Raisin Walnut! Yesterday afternoon I tried the Maple Nut flavor because it definitely seems to be a popular flavor but I must say I was not a big fan and I was kind of disappointed. I had high hopes for this flavor and it let me down :/ The bar was alright but nothing special! It definitely tasted like maple syrup and was sweet with pieces of pecans mixed in. I guess I will have to give it another shot!

Don't know whats on the agenda for today but hope you all have a great Saturday!

Dinner with Grammy

Morning! Happy Friday! This is my first time posting from my iPhone so bear with me!

Last night my Grammy and I went out to dinner together. My aunt and mom were supposed to come with us as well but my aunt forgot she had to go to my cousin's art show and spaghetti dinner. Then my mom was very nervous I wasn't going to eat at the restaurant so she was scared for me but she wanted to come. I told her I was obviuosly going to eat. I mean what did she think I was going to skip dinner and just sit there and watch everyone else eat?! I mean come on mom! So I told her she didn't have to come with me and I would go by myself! I promised her I would eat and it was probably a good thing she ended up not coming because all of my previuos experiences going out to restaurants with my mom do NOT go well! So I thought it was a good it was just my Grammy and I because this was my first time in awhile eating out at a restaurant.

Last night we ended up going to a very popular Irish restaurant, O'Connors. I have never been there before but my Grammy has been there several times before. My moms side of the family is very Irish and my dads side is very Italian. So of course my Grammy has been to O'Connors many times considering she is 100% Irish!

On a Thursday night the restaurant was packed. When I got there I thought there would be at least an hour or so wait but as soon as we walked in they sat us down immediately! My Grammy says no matter when you come, lunch or dinner, weeknight or weekend it is always crowded!

The atmosphere and the ambiance was great! The hotesses and waitresses are all so nice and talked with an Irish accent. I felt like I was actually in a pub in Ireland!

The menu had a wide selection of food, mostly of Irish inspired meals!

My Grammy is so considerate and always thinking of me since I am her oldest grandchild of fourteen ;) She suggested earlier this week that I go online to look at the menu to get an idea of what they had. So that is what I did! I love it when restaurants have their menus online so before I go I can see what they serve. It eases my anxiety before going out so I know ahead of time what is on the menu. It it also helpful because I can make sure there is something on the menu that will fit well into my meal plan!

I knew exactly what I wanted when I looked at the menu online...seafood! The first time I ever tried seafood was actually when I was inpatient at Walden last year and ever since I love it! I wasn't sure if I wanted the baked scrod or salmon but I ended up ordering the Baked Boston Scrod. My Grammy and I actually ordered the same exact dinner! Haha.

The meal started out with a soup or salad but we both chose the starter salads. I got mine with Italian dressing on the side and she got ranch.

The Boston baked scrod came with a vegetable medley and rice pilaf on the side. The scrod was delicious. It was nice white and flaky. Perfect! Scrod is definitely my favorite seafood thus far but I do want to try other fish as well.

The meal was great and it was a great dinner date with my Grammy. I love her!

Since my aunt and mom didn't come with us tonight my Grammy suggested we come again next week to use up the rest of the gift cards we have! She really likes O'Connors and I was all down for coming again next week!

Holy yum and Holy yuck!

Morning! I just had to post this morning because I have to tell you how much I loved my dinner last night featuring SWEET POTATOES! I couldn't resist not trying these cheetahs ever since seeing them everywhere in the blog world. I have heard nothing but good things about them so I knew I just had to try them and last night was the night!

I cut one sweet potato into circular discs and placed them on aluminum foil on a baking sheet. I cooked them for 15 mintues on one side and then flipped them over to let them cook for another 15 minutes.

The end result came out stellar! I could smell the cheetahs baking in the oven and they came out perfect with brown spots! I may have cut some of the slices a bit too thin but next time I know to cut them a little thicker.

*NOTE* Before you start leaving anon comments bashing on how this is NOT enough for dinner (because I know that is what you were gonna do anyways!) this was just a part of my dinner last night. I just want to clarify this and show the highlight of my dinner, which was the sweet potatoes! I paired my sweet potato fries with a veggie burger for dinner. I also had a side of steamed broccoli, a dinner roll, and a glass of milk that went unpictured. I just wanted to share with you the highlight of my dinner! The sweet potatoes were delicious and I am so glad I finally had the chance to make them! You can bet I will be having these soon in the near future.

So after having a great experience with sweet potatoes last night I thought I was going to have yet another delicious meal this morning but boy was I WRONG! I wanted to give oatmeal another try after seeing all of you bloggers having it all the time and loving it!

I started off by combining 1/2 cup Quaker Oats and 1 cup water on the stove top with one sliced banana. I continued to mix all the ingredients together for about 5 minutes until the oats get to a thick consistency. While cooking it looked pretty good and I was excited to eat it topped with some Crazy Richard's creamy peanut butter on top.
But this bowl of oatmeal was the exact opposite of what I thought of my cheetahs :( I have to be honest with you...OATMEAL is not for me! I am so much more of a yogurt mess kind of girl ;) Can't wait to be reunited with my yogurt mess for breakfast tomorrow morning!This bowl of oatmeal was BLAH. There was no taste whatsoever and I nearly had to force it down my throat to finish it. Yuck! I should have just threw it away and made something else but I don't like wasting food so I managed to finish it. You will not be seeing me make oatmeal any time soon in the near future.

So I had a holy yum dinner and a holy yuck breakfast! But hey ya learn from your mistakes and you only know if you will like something if you give it a try and that is what I did. Right? Ya win some and ya lose some ;)

TJ's 2 days in a row?

Happy Humpday! Hope your Wednesday is treating ya well.

I started my day off by having breakfast (obvi) in a different bowl besides my beautiful Anthroplogie one ;) I added a lil twist to my breakfast and made a yogurt parfait!See all the layers?! The bottom layer was half the Vanilla Brown Cow yogurt, followed by Kashi Go Lean, half sliced banana, then the other half of the yogurt, more Kashi Go Lean, and then the rest of the banana topped with Crazy Richard's creamy pb!

After breakfast my mom and I were off to my Nutritionist Appointment! I was so glad I was finally meeting with her after a week of cancelling because she was sick for the past week. We both had a bunch of questions to ask her and she answered every single one of them! My nutritionist is so knowledgable and knows A LOT about eating disorders! She could be a nutritionist and a therapist I swear, that is how good she is. I am thrilled I have a nutritionist I really enjoy. We came up with a solid meal plan for me to follow. It is kind of based off of the one I used from this past summer which worked out well for me. I am meeting with her again next week as well to see how everything is going!

After the appointment we ran some errands which included getting my much needed eye brows waxed and then to Trader Joe's. It's not like I went yesterday or anything at all ;) But my mom suggested we go because she wanted to get some stuff and I was obviuosly up for it!

We got a bunch more goods but here are some ;) We have blue corn tortilla chips, hummus, organic corn, organic carrots, broccoli, sweet potatoes, oatmeal raisin cookies, salsa, trail mix, pb filled pretzels, white cheddar corn puffs, and organic mini cheese bites.TJ's has a WIDE variety of nuts/trail mixes and I always get so overwhelmed by all of them! There is everything from peanuts, cashews, almonds, pecans, hazelnuts, macadamia nuts etc. Then some have fruit and some have chocolate chips. Some are sweet and some are salty. The options just never end, honestly! And of course ED tells me I can't have the trail mixes with the chocolate chips or M & M's in them. I mean because that would be sinful he tells me! So as of right now I tend to stay away from those but one day soon I will buy TJ's Temptation Mix which I saw on SnackFace and then saw it in the store today and boy does it look tempting!

Today before going into the store I made a goal for myself to simply go over to the nut isle and just look for a trail mix that I would seem to like and just buy it! Not to look at the calories and not compare it to others or stand in the isle debating about it for minutes. I must say I completed my goal and ended up with the Trek Mix. So I will give it a try soon and see how it is!

Peanut butter filled pretzels. Need I say more?Smooth and Creamy Classic Hummus. The same thing happened again with the hummus at TJ there are just so many options! But this time I just decided to go with the classic flavor because I am kind of a hummus-virgin, only having it like once this past summer and I want to bring it back into my life because I have seen such awesome recipes on all of your lovely blogs I want to try!Fresh Mild Salsa which my mom says is very good. I will have to give it a shot to see if she is right!SWEET POTATOES! I wasn't leaving the store with out them, let's just say that! I have seen SOO many of you bloggies make Kailey's cheetah fries and rave about them oh so much that I couldn't resist any longer not trying them myself!Gotta get those veggies...organic broccoli, organic carrots, and organic corn.Let's pretend I didn't buy these 2 Clif Bars ;) My obsession has kind of spiraled out of control with Clif Bars. But I couldn't help it, I haven't tried the Carrot Cake and TJ's had it and I really liked the Chocolate Chip flavor, so I had to! I mean really, how can you blame me?

After our TJ's run and chit chatting with our neighbor at the store for way too long, we finally arrived back home. Once back it was lunch time and I just had to use this poor pear that was on it's last leg.
For lunch I made a turkey panini with american cheese, lettuce, and tomato on whole wheat bread. Along side I had some pretzels, the pear, and a glass of milk. This panini was a great one because I kinda left it to cook in the panini maker for a little bit longer than usual and let the cheese really melt and the bread get nice and crispy! Boy do I love Mr. George Foreman!

This afternoon I had the Blackcherry Almond Clif Bar and for dinner i made...CHEETAHS! Let's just say I will most likely be having them again tomorrow night for dinner.

Productive Tuesday

Hey lovies! Hope you are having a great Tuesday! Mine has been very cold, rainy, and windy. Gotta love the New England winter weather ;) I had a very busy, productive, and good day though!

Now I know a lot of you are probably wondering why I am still blogging and not in-patient at Walden right now! Well don't worry I will talk all about it later on in this post. But let me first recap back to last nights eats for dinner. Yup, that's right I had breakfast for dinner and it was delicious.I made myself an egg omlet using 2 whole eggs and 1/4 cup cheese. I have never really made an omlet before, usually mom makes them for me. But since she wasn't home I had to be the chef for the night. I don't think it is supposed to be that brown but oh well, I think I just burnt it a wee bit and still tasted fine.I also had an english muffin on the side with Polaner's Seedless Raspberry spread and a glass of milk on the side.cute lil smiley face ;)Then for an evening snack I had a Boost. But not just a Vanilla, Strawberry, or Chocolate flavor...but BUTTER PECAN! First of all I didn't even know they had this flavor until my mom found it the other day while grocery shopping! We both had never seen this flavor before and she already had them in the cart ready to buy them! Gotta love her! I just knew I had to buy them along with Vanilla and Strawberry.

Let me tell you this flavor was amazing! I chilled it in the freezer for a half hour before drinking to get it nice and cold and it was perfect! It tasted like pecan, butter, and vanilla. I feel like I was like drinking a delicious milkshake but really it was a yummy nutritional drink ;) You will DEFINITELY be seeing me drinking more of these in the future!

Now onto breakfast this morning featuring yet another yogurt mess! Gotta have the key components such as...Brown Cow yogurtKashi Go Leana banana (I only had 1 but I took a picture of our lil banana holder)Party with Potassium ;) I thought it was cute.Crazy Richard's creamy pbthe end result!Ok so as much as I love my Anthropologie bowl I must say I am kind of getting sick of looking at it every day on the blog and I assume you are too! I need to get more cute breakfast bowls ;)yogurt mess all mixed up like it should be! Perfect and delicious :)Morning snack was a Vanilla Boost with a serving of almonds. Then my mom and I went to go vote for the Senate Race. Yeah for voting!!

Lunch was a turkey panini on whole wheat bread with american cheese, lettuce, and tomatoes with some pretzels, an apple, and milk. I must say I am kind of getting sick of apples as well, so I WILL be switching it up in the near future.

Then it was time for my doctors appointment with my mom! I was super nervous and anxious to see what was going to happen.

So to back track to last Saturday when all hell broke lose for me. The director of Health Services officially told me I had to take a medical leave from school to seek more medical attention and come up with a plan with my doctor before returning back to school.

So as of right now I am currently on medical leave for school for the next few weeks. I am only allowed to miss up to two weeks for medical leave or then I will be too far behind in my classes to catch up and would have to withdrawal for the semester which is NOT what I want to do since I had to withdrawal last spring for my ED (not fun!)

On Saturday when I was in tears after I found out I couldn't go back to school, I thought I was done for the semester and I would definitely be going back to Walden. I thought that was my only option. So I did call like I told you all and then on Sunday I had my telephone intake and then I was scheduled to be admitted this morning.

Well over the weekend I did a lot of thinking as to what I was going to do. I mean I couldn't afford to miss another semester of school but I also need to get healthy, strong, and get my life back. I had so much going through my mind!

On Sunday when I totally took a 360 turn in the right direction, I decided I was sick of this ED ruining everything and I wanted it to change! I knew I wanted to get over this ED, move on with my life, and get back to school. That was my goal and I was determined to conquer it.

So even though I told you I was admitting myself to in-patient treatment on Saturday I still had other options. I wanted to meet with my doctor to come up with a plan as to what I should do to get healthy and be able to return back to school.

This afternoon my doctor, my mom, and I all met to come up with a solid plan we all felt was going to be successful for me. My doctor basically told me Health Services slammed the door in my face this past Saturday but is willing to open it up again for me! In order for me to return back to school I must have a plan in order. Like I said before I can only take up to two weeks off from school for my medical absence before having to withdrawal for the semester. So for the next two weeks I need to show some major improvement not only to myself but to everyone else as well. I will be having several weigh-ins at my doctors over the next few weeks to make sure I am doing well and I also will be seeing my therapist weekly. These next two weeks at home are crucial for me to do well! As long as I can keep it up over the next few weeks and do what I need to do then hopefully I will be able to return back to campus. I just hope I can do it! Well actually...I know I can do it! Ever since Sunday morning I have a totally new positive attitude towards recovery:)

Oh yeah I also had to get some blood work done and get an EKG while at the doctors this afternoon as well.

With that being said as of right now I will NOT be going in-patient at Walden, at least not this week. But however if I am not doing well at home over these next few weeks I will most likely be going back. I am sorry for saying on Saturday I was admitting myself to Walden. I know a lot of you were all so happy for me that I was going to going to get treatment. I only said that was because I thought that was my only option, I didn't know there were other options I had. But over the weekend I did a lot of thinking and I decided what I wanted to do and what I thought would be best for me.

So again I am so so sorry for telling you I was going in-patient and now I am not. I bet a lot of you are disappointed in me but I feel as though I made the right decision in my recovery. I didn't mean to lie to you or anything at all. I hope you all understand where I am coming from!

Okay so moving onto the foodie front...I may or may not have a lil obsession with Clif Bars now ;) No shame! I don't know why I never ate these bars over the past summer rather than having Power Bars all the time. Well actually I do know why! ED always told me Clif Bars have a few more calories in them than Power Bars so that I should stay away from them. That's why! But really what does ED know? Oh yeah...NOTHING!

But ever since having an ED and recovering from it I have learned a whole lot about food and nutrition. I must say I am now a fan of Clif Bars because of their great nutrition, taste, and whole organic and natural ingredients!

So basically I am saying I have a new found love for Clif Bars ;) And you could probably guess what I had for an afternoon snack! If you guessed a Clif Bar then you are right. Blueberry Crisp Clif Bar that is!

Tonight I went to my sister's high school basketball game toinght with my mom and lil sis then came home to have some dinner. I am currently watching The Biggest Loser with my dad and then I am gonna have a Strawberry Boost before going to bed!

Tomorrow morning I have a Nutritionist Appointment! I am actually looking forward to meeting with her since I was supposed to see her last Wednesday but I had to keep re-scheduling with her because she has been sick. My mom and I both have lots of questions for her and I can't wait to see what she has to say! I hope it all goes well.

Night chicas :)